Day Forty Eight

I finished up my paper for my Grammar class today :) Not the best paper I've ever written, but I'd still say it's an okay job considering all that matters for my grade is grammar.

In many ancient societies, the purpose of marriage was anything but romance. Because of this, many practices existed then that would seem strange in today’s society. For example, during the time of Genghis Khan, widows from wealthy Mongolian families were often remarried to their deceased husbands’ brother, cousin or son (Mongolian nobles frequently had children with multiple women, so a widow could marry her husband’s son without marrying her own offspring). This arrangement benefitted both the husband’s family and the bride. Because the bride was marrying into the same family, the family avoided paying another bride price for the marriage of one of their males and the bride could keep her inheritance and continue to gain wealth from her association with the family. 

Since most marriages in ancient times were constructed for economic or political reasons, love wasn’t considered important when choosing a wife or husband – many times, the marriage was arranged by the parents or older family members, so the couple had no say in whom they were going to marry. Because marriages had no romance in them, there was little need for courtship before the marriage; in fact, suitors had to put more effort into winning over the parents of the bride than winning over the bride herself.  However, the mentality of practicality before romance began to change, at least in European society, with the rise of chivalry during the Middle Ages. Potential suitors used serenades and poetry to win the favor of a lady with the hope that she would persuade her parents into allowing her to marry him. Of course, wealth was still more valued than romantic gestures, but grandiose gestures could give one wealthy suitor an advantage over the others.

As social restrictions loosened and love became a more valued component in relationships, the prevalence and importance of romantic courtships grew rapidly. While wealth was still important when considering a marriage, individuals had the freedom to marry almost anyone they wanted within their socio-economic class. Because of this, women had more choice in whom they married, making it more important for a man to impress a lady with more than just his money if he had an interest in her. In the 16^th and 17^th centuries, the custom of bundling allowed couples to get to know each other without the risk of sexual misconduct. Couples could talk and get to know each other while sharing a bed, but they were required to remain fully clothed and keep a “bundling board” between them.

“Dating” during the Victorian Era resembled much of what we consider dating today, except the process was much more formal and supervised. At a party or event, once a gentleman and lady were formally introduced, the man would present her with his card if he was interested in her (the Victorian Era equivalent to buying her a drink). At the end of night, the lady would go over her options and choose the gentleman who would escort her home and drop her off at her door. The couple would then court much like a modern couple under the watchful eye of the lady’s parents. From there, dating evolved into the often complicated and confusing practice it is today.